Dating older men in college
It can be tough when you and your older partner can’t share childhood commonalities (dude’s never read a book!?
), but the benefits can certainly outweigh those little things.
Now, I’m not saying these are conscious reasons why dating a man quite a bit older—there have been several moments when I’ve thought that going out with someone closer to my age would be much simpler.
I even tried it when my boyfriend and I took a short break, and I found it was painstakingly difficult and more complicated than my experience dating an older guy. The texting games (How long should I wait to text him back? It’s exhausting), the fear of commitment that plagues most twentysomethings, and the simple fact that most guys my age aren’t as emotionally mature as I am.
People are shocked when I respond “mutual friends.” How could a girl in her early 20s be friends with people in their late 30s?
Well, I was (and still am) friends with a select crew of musicians and creatives in Los Angeles, and my boyfriend happened to be a part of that scene.
Getting awkward questions (wait, do you know each other?! I find it difficult to explain to people how my relationship came to be.
After all, going up to a total stranger in a bar and making an impression isn’t easy, and it takes a certain amount of confidence, which often comes with age.
From what I’ve gathered, a man in his 20s is more likely to blow his cash on frivolous things, while men in their 30s and are likely to save money for the future or for experiences, like a romantic vacation (wink, wink). “He texted me an hour after I texted him.” “What should I text him back? I can still remember the days when I’d utter those words and essentially have an anxiety attack every time my phone buzzed and it was a guy my own age I’d been casually seeing.
When I first started dating my boyfriend, it threw me off when he didn’t text me, but—wait for it— instead.
While you figure out the math, let me be clear that I’ve met several other women in their early- to mid-20s who also prefer to date from a much older pool for various reasons.
And while cliché dictates that, sure, men are into it, there’s been some recent research done about younger females often gravitate toward mature men.