Dating black woman
While it may be hard for two people from widely different intersections of race and gender to understand each other, it’s not impossible once the more privileged party (in this case, the white guy) is able to recognize their shortcomings and how the intersections of race and gender affect every aspect of a black woman’s life.
A white man must be willing to work toward a better understanding of how race and gender intersect differently for everyone, and he must also be prepared to speak out against the injustices that their partners will endure.
He kept touching my hair without my consent, was legitimately disappointed that I could not twerk, and called me “sassy” whenever I voiced an opinion that was different from his.
Unfortunately, that wasn’t the first or last awkward date I’ve had with a white man.
Microaggressions are comments or actions that unintentionally alienate or demean a marginalized person or group.
These include, but are not limited to, saying things such as “You’re [insert positive adjective] for a black girl! ”These may seem harmless to some, but they’re actually symptoms of deeper problems rooted in systematic oppressions that black women face daily.
Our race and gender affects the way we carry ourselves, and this uncomfortable mindfulness is something that white men simply cannot relate to.
These are harmful stereotypes that will not only make your black partner uncomfortable, they will further marginalize them.
You should want to date a person because you like who they are and have compatible views and interests, not because their race is the next thing to do on your bucket list or because you were enthralled by their “exotic ways” (honestly, are you doing an anthropological study on black culture? If you answered no to these questions and you think those assumptions on black womanhood are downright absurd (hint: they are), then perhaps you are well on your way to showing a black woman that you want to date a complete person and not a stereotype!
So, as you’re getting to know this woman, be sure to keep the following in mind: Race is going to come up in any interracial coupling, but These are perfect examples of microaggressions.
When you compliment a black woman in this way, you are implying that we are exceptions to the rule — the rule being that that black women are not attractive, intelligent, or posses any other positive attributes.