Dating and oral sex
More likely, it trumps living with someone who has stopped trying."When people are dating, they are 'auditioning'," says Dr. "Unfortunately, many long-term couples start to put away those little affectionate details and take each other for granted.When another person enters the picture, the spouse who was inattentive can suddenly realize they have been part of the problem.So if both partners really want the relationship to last, they work harder at everything-including sex." As you can imagine, who did the cheating matters.We all know that infidelity is a potent relationship-destroyer, an atom bomb that few unions withstand. In pointing fingers, about 12 percent of both sexes say that their partner cheated on them-which hints that many ladies are too optimistic about their man's whereabouts at this very second.Surprisingly few people say the cheating did irreparable harm to their relationship: Roughly 40 percent report that it had no effect at all, about 30 percent think it only caused temporary tension, and a mere 6 percent or less say it was the fatal blow.What's more, some report that infidelity made their relationship better.
"My sex life is even better than [it was] in my teens and 20s," says Carrie F., 50, who keeps a full dance card in Van Nuys, Calif., and isn't planning on settling for one beau any time soon.More options means she's never dateless, she points out."If one of my partners is not available for whatever reason, I can always call another one." Of course, a lot of married people are doing just fine and laugh at the notion that great sex and marriage don't endure.Pepper Schwartz, a sexologist at the University of Washington in Seattle and AARP's love and relationships ambassador."It's hard for some people to feel warm and sexy when they are afraid of losing their home-or they have already lost their job!